Day 16

My day started out with Aiden yelling at me from his bedroom to make breakfast, rude. Quickly followed by him throwing a huge fit because all we had in the drawer were "girl spoons."

A fit after being awake for just a few minutes = a sign of a notso fun day.

Our morning consisted of bickering and tattle-telling, the usual. Aiden gets lunch at school (I'm guessing around 1ish) but I always offer him something here at their usual 11:00 lunchtime. He wanted a ham and cheese sandwich, I told him I didn't have any and I got: "Well that's what I want." Wow... not okay with that talk. I made them a Pb&j and cut it in half, like I ALWAYS do. Oh man. The boy got upset. By this point I was yelling. He had been nothing but mean and rude all morning!

We talked, things calmed down, he ate, got cleaned up for school- all the while I was talking about him adjusting his attitude and making better choices. This is one of our main focuses lately, telling the kids that they alone are responsible for making good/bad decisions and what the outcomes will be because of those decisions.

He was happy when I pick him up from school and happily went to soccer practice with Grandpa. (Thankful he offered to take him, this cold and Aiden are kicking my booty!) He came home with French fries, Rian asked for one and he flat out refused to give her ONE. Heeeeere we go. I gave them a bath and told him to go to his room and stay there. Twenty minutes later, around 7:10, I went back there and he was sound asleep with his light on. And I started crying.

I hate getting mad at him, I hate yelling at him. I hate feeling like we're doing this all wrong. His attitude may have been the stinkiest it's ever been, but I just wanted to wake him up and tell him I'm sorry. I absolutely hate that he fell asleep sad, without a kiss and me telling him I love him.

Being a parent is so challenging, rewarding beyond words, but so soo many challenges. I love them with everything I am, even on the days where I could rip my hair out.

I pray tomorrow is a better day and Aiden wakes up with a happy heart. I also pray that he always has forgiveness in his heart for the many, many mistakes we'll make along the way.

My little boy sleeping, then and now: