Relax- easier said than done.

I've been trying to ignore my feelings about this weekend's camping trip but the closer it gets, the more I start to silently freak out. For a number of reasons.

For starters, in my opinion, a Dad's mentality is sooo different from a Mom's. [Don't get offended, babe.] Most guys are more relaxed, thinking "Ooh that'll never happen" and women [at least me] are totally opposite- thinking of every little scenario that could possibly happen. "What if he trips and falls into the fire?! What if he gets bit by a snake?!" and so on. Horrible thoughts, but I have them. I would love to be as chill as Steven is when it comes to the kids. And who knows if they'll have phone reception- eek! I'm going to be worried the whole time.

Another thing, not only am I bothered by my not being there when it comes to safety, but I won't be there for one of Aiden's "firsts." His first camping trip! I won't be there to take a million pictures, capturing every last detail. I'm so sad about this, I'm a crazy Mom like that!

Also, I'm a chicken- 100%. The last time Steven was gone over night was Novemeber, three years ago when him and his Dad went to Colorado. Aiden and I stayed at my parents' house because I didn't want to be here at night. I get scared as it is when Steven's here. I'm way too paranoid to be alone. I'm still unsure if I'm going to be a big girl and sleep here... I don't want to be regretting that decision in the middle of the night. We'll see.

I'm happy they're going to have boy-bonding time and Ri and I girl-bonding time. I just need to relax. I know he'll be fine, but I'm a worrier. I can't help it. I'm going to be worried about him til the day I die.